School starts again and I'm SURE this'll be a GREAT year!! It is a year of changes and I mean good changes. For the first time in my life I was able to decorate my diary in time for school jaajja and I like it:P
In fact I would love to say that this entry is about how happy I am with this new year, which I really am, but it's not. I'm completely and absolutly debastated with, well you already might be able to guess, yeah, that's right, with love.
Not a new love but this unsuccessfully unrequited love of mines. It's bodering me again. I don't even see him now but I feel his presence in each of the school's corridors, in each class, everywhere. What's more, and harder for me to stand, is that I thought I was ready to forget him (and I am) but my best friend has become like a sister with him. They send EVERY DAY a message and then she tells me. I KNOW that's not her intentions. Of course I do get that but it still hurts.......a lot:( cause even if I want to forget about him I still envy her for being able to speak with him, to be as we once were. I envy her for being able to do what I can't, to be the person I most want to become to him. I would give EVERYTHING to return to that time...
It's SOO unfair... I mean I told him from the start I didn't want to lose him as a friend and that that was why I didin't want to tell him my feelings. But of course he HAD TO insist that I would gain something mor important. Well, here I am, and I don't see that SOMETHING neither I see my old friend:(
Well it's just a feeling taht will sometime fade, but his friendship has already vanished, at least the one I once met and the one I want. Did things really had to happen this way?? Couldn't they just stay as they were and (even though I do loved each of every memories) couldn't we have hide our feelings?? NO I wouldn't like that.... ARGGGG. I'm tired of this... WHO CARES?? I LOST HIM. HE WON'T COME BACK TO ME! SO WHY DOES HE HAVE TO KEEP HURTING ME!??!¬¬
I know I must have said it before people: love SUCKS!!
sincerely a foolish girl....
